TOUCHSTONE
We shall find a time, Audrey; patience, gentle Audrey.
AUDREY
Faith, the priest was good enough, for all the old gentleman’s saying.
TOUCHSTONE
A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey, a most vile Martext. But Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you.
AUDREY
Ay, I know who . He no interest in me in the world.
AUDREY
Here comes the man you mean.
TOUCHSTONE
It is meat and drink to me to see a clown. By my troth, we that have good wits have much to answer for. We shall be flouting; we cannot hold.
WILLIAM
Good ev’n, Audrey.
AUDREY
God good ev’n, William.
WILLIAM
And good ev’n to you, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Good ev’n, gentle friend. Cover head, cover head. Nay, , be covered. How old are you, friend?
WILLIAM
Five-and-twenty, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
A ripe age. Is name William?
WILLIAM
William, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
A fair name. Wast born i’ th’ forest here?
WILLIAM
Ay, sir, I thank God.
TOUCHSTONE
“Thank God.” A good answer. Art rich?
WILLIAM
Faith, sir, so-so.
TOUCHSTONE
“So-so” is good, very good, very excellent good. And yet it is not, it is but so-so. Art wise?
WILLIAM
Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.
TOUCHSTONE
Why, sayst well. I do now remember a saying: “The fool think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.” The heathen philosopher, when he had a desire to eat a grape, would open his lips when he put it into his mouth, meaning thereby that grapes were made to eat and lips to open. You do love this maid?
WILLIAM
I do, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Give me your hand. Art learned?
WILLIAM
No, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Then learn this of me: to have is to have. For it is a figure in rhetoric that drink, being poured out of cup into a glass, by filling the one empty the other. For all your writers do consent that ipse is “he.” Now, you are not ipse, for I am he.
WILLIAM
Which he, sir?
TOUCHSTONE
He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, you clown, abandon—which is in the vulgar, “leave”—the society—which in the boorish is “company”—of this female—which in the common is “woman”; which together is, abandon the society of this female, or, clown, perishest; or, to better understanding, diest; or, to wit, I kill , make away, translate life into death, liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison with , or in bastinado, or in steel. I will bandy with in faction; will o’errun with policy. I will kill a hundred and fifty ways! Therefore tremble and depart.
AUDREY
Do, good William.
WILLIAM
God rest you merry, sir.
CORIN
Our master and mistress seek you. Come away, away.
TOUCHSTONE
Trip, Audrey, trip, Audrey! I attend, I attend.